Saturday, February 20, 2010

Sex, love and laws

Do you remember when you first learned about sex? Growing up in the 1950's, we were not exposed to all of the sexual innuendoes that are in the media nowadays, such as the blatant references in prime time TV shows, movies and music. Believe it or not, the first time I heard the "F" word was when I was in the 4th or 5th grade. I had overheard a boy in my class use it when he dropped his pencil. When I came home from school that day, I innocently asked my Mom what "f__k" meant. She was shocked I'm sure at first, and then she decided to sit me down and give me the whole birds and bees story. Then it was my turn to be shocked! I never thought I would have gotten such a huge explanation after such a short question. I do remember that she made sure she referred to sex as "the marriage act", so that it would leave the impression that it was to be done only when you are married and wanting to start a family. That's how God intended it to be.

Then my adolescence began in the 60's. It was a culturally changing time. Young men burned their draft cards and women burned their bras. Peace, free love and women's lib ruled the day. We were part of the Woodstock generation who had lyrics to songs, like from Crosby, Stills and Nash, who told us "if you can't be with the one you love....love the one your with". Medical science had advanced enough to give us "The Pill" and condoms were available too. All this gave us the freedom and "protection" to participate in all this free love. The morals and values our parents taught us were going down the drain. If women still ended up getting pregnant, despite the fact that we had all this contraception available to us, some would choose to seek out back alley abortions. Roe v Wade became the law of the land in 1973, in order to give women a "proper, safe and legal" way to obtain an abortion.

I believe all of us can agree that the topic of abortion is a touchy subject because many people have very strong feelings about it. There are the hard core pro lifers, and at the opposite end, the hard core pro choice people. But I do believe there are a lot of people in the middle who are still on the fence and aren't sure what to think. Some may not think or care about this topic at all and would not consider this issue a priority, compared to all of the other serious problems we currently are facing in this nation. But whatever value a society places on the sanctity of life, does play a role in legislation, such as the current healthcare reform bill that the President, and some in Congress, are still trying to pass. The bill that was passed in the House is much "friendlier" (?) to the unborn; the one passed in the Senate is not. There are no protective amendments in that one. Many have concerns that taxpayer money will be used to finance a woman's right to choose an abortion, to terminate a pregnancy.

I believe it's all a matter of perception. The way the growing life within the womb is viewed is the difference. When does life begin? Some believe it is just a lump of cells or a mass of tissue and don't give it a human face. I also believe many women are thinking more about their own current life situation and whether or not it's a good time to have a child. The pro choice people always like to give the reasons that they're concerned about women's health, or what if the pregnancy resulted from a rape? I would venture to say that those two reasons are in the vast minority, and the most prevalent reason for a woman wanting an abortion is because it's bad timing, inconvenient, or frankly....just unwanted.

The pro life people know that science tells us within 3 weeks of being conceived, there is a new, little heart beating in the womb. That means the mother hasn't even missed her first period yet and probably does not even realize she is pregnant and has a new and growing life within her. When she does eventually go in to see a doctor, the heartbeat can usually be detected and heard. So if the mother makes the choice to have an abortion, the consequnces of that decision is that it will ultimately stop a beating heart. There should be no dispute on that fact. Some may not want to admit it's a life, or a baby yet, but it does undeniably have a heartbeat. In this day and age, our society does not give any rights to, nor does this potential new life have any choice in it's fate. It's ability to have the opportunity to live out it's life....it's own destiny, is in the hands of it's own mother.  It's her choice as to whether it gets that chance or not, as the law states now.

So the focus on abortion for pro choice people is mainly on the mother. The pro life people's focus is not only on the mother, but also on the innocent and growing new life within her. There is help out there, if you're an unwed mother. There is also the choice to give up the baby for adoption. Why end an innocent life, when there are other options out there?

Millions of innocent lives would not have been created, and then abruptly terminated, if women would have been more sexually responsible in the first place. My husband told our teenaged sons, "If you want to 'play', you better be willing to 'pay'.  Meaning, if you are man enough to father a child, you better be there to be a father to that child.  I believe he was right, my mother was right, and God's teachings are right too.  Free love is irresponsible, degrading, and can cause great pain and grief down the road for you.  Why would you want to be hurting yourself and your loved ones?  Why would you sacrifice all that, just for those few brief moments of pleasure???  And we all know it can have negative effects on the men too.  Just ask Tiger Woods.  He's paying dearly for all the fun he had, and at least two innocent lives were lost when one of the many women  who took part in  those sexual encounters, admitted to having had an abortion and a miscarriage.  The tangled web we weave!  Human lives should not be used and then discarded, and these women need to wise up.    

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